1 December 2014

Why Women Dump Men - Do You Know Why She Left You?

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If you really stop and think about it you might still have a difficult time figuring out why women dump men. That's because many men still find women to be a huge mystery. It's part of their charm most of the time but in moments like these can be the bane of your existence. The good news is that women are not as difficult to figure out as you've been taught they are.

They really only want one thing from you: an abundance of appreciation. She works hard to make your life run smoothly. She does the dishes, cooks your meals, washes your clothes, folds your socks, and even cleans your bathroom. In fact, she does many of these things so well you might not even notice that she's doing them.

That's when the trouble starts. She doesn't realize that by not noticing these things it's actually a compliment to her (because we all know you'd notice if dinner wasn't getting made or your lunches weren't getting packed every morning). I bet she even sets the coffee pot so that you have a nice piping hot cup of much needed caffeine every morning. Have you told her how much you appreciate all these little things she does that makes your life easier?  If not, give it a try and watch how quickly everything about her just lights up and glows. She does this for you. She wants to make you happy. That makes her happy. All she really needs in return is for her efforts to be noticed and appreciated.

Some men mistake this for high maintenance but she does a lot in return for the appreciation she's asking for. It's a fair trade unless you really want to mate your own socks, cook your own meals, and clean your own toilets for the rest of your life. The reason I say this is that all women want to be appreciated for these little things and that lack of appreciation is one of the major reasons why women dump men. It will eventually become a bone of contention in all your relationships if you don't master it early and learn it well.

Brownie Points
Do you want to know how to score a few extra special brownie points in the appreciation department? She'll be speechless and feel so loved when you do this. Offer to do all these things for her for one day while she goes out and gets her nails or hair done. Give her a day off and you take on the jobs she does for you all the time. You might even get tears of joy, a lot of respect, and some very personal adoration from her as a result.
Knowing why women dump men can help you avoid this situation. Now that you know what she needs, what are you going to do to make sure she gets it?

28 October 2014

How To Seduce A Woman


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Men who seduce women are not setting a trap, they are presenting an opportunity. Either way, the man is the bait and the result is the same in the end. You can by a book or study a website that teaches you how to seduce women, but in the end, it is all up to you.
Do you want to know how to seduce women? Be yourself. Be attentive. Be the kind of man that women want to be with. Who are those guys? They are just like you, only better at seduction.
A man who successfully seduces women is sure of himself. He doesn’t need female companionship, though he does desire it, the same way a woman desires male companionship. A seductive man is assured, he has everything he needs, but he realizes he needs a little something more. He needs good company. He needs a woman the way a woman needs a man. He doesn’t assert his need, but he lets a lady know he is available.

A seductive man is open to listening. He is open to touching. He is open to letting his lady companion express herself. He pays attention. He doesn’t direct the conversation, he follows the flow, adding his insights and commiserating when appropriate. A seductive man has open ears and open eyes. When the moment is ripe, a man with seduction on his mind holds his lady friend’s hand. He touches her arm. He touches her cheek. He watches the woman’s reaction. When she has had enough he withdraws. When she feels the thrill is over, a seductive man doesn’t press the issue. He waits for the next opportunity. Seduction is a series of steps, one moment at a time.

A seductive man is himself. He has a life and he is successful at what he does, even if it is being a night clerk at a convenience store. Not every man can be a high-powered attorney, an influential politician, or a popular celebrity. Attractive women know this. Chances are, the woman you are trying to seduce is none of these things, either. Just be good and content at what you do. Women respect a man who is sure of himself and his abilities. An auto mechanic can be the best lover. He knows how moving parts fit together.
 
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When a man seduces a woman, he appeals to her natural inclinations. He studies her. He learns what she likes, what turns her on and what turns her off, what makes her blush and what puts a spark in her eye. The seductive man sets off sparks whenever he can. When a man seduces a woman he follows her lead without taking control, though he steers conversations and he makes himself available to the woman’s needs.

Nothing is more electric than touch. A seductive man is not overly eager to kiss or to hug, but he does it when it is appropriate, and he does it with a purpose. He does it to set off sparks. If the moment isn’t right, a seductive man doesn’t overstay his welcome. Always keep them wanting more. When in doubt, defer or cut it short. She'll tell you if she wants more. There is always tomorrow. Seduction can be a long enticing dance.

23 October 2014

5 Tips To Help You Find A Serious Relationship Online


Have you been online dating for a long time and just can’t seem to keep a man interested for more than a few weeks at a time? If this is the case for you, do not worry; you are far from alone in having this problem. One of the most difficult parts of meeting men online is that men have access to hundreds of women every single time they sign on the computer. Not only does this create way too many options for men, but it also encourages bad behavior, and can even create somewhat of an online dating addiction for men, as they consistently strive to find that next big thing.

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In order to find the type of quality guy online that we know is not going to fall into these habits, one has to be on the look out for certain signs that make it much more likely he is looking for a serious relationship. While there is no way we can guarantee he is not one of those dreaded serial daters, looking for certain signs may help us to severely decrease our chances of this happening. So let’s take a look at a few clues that will help you to week out the worst men, and choose the best.

1. The length of his online dating profile.
The length of a man’s profile will reveal a lot about who he is, and what he is all about. If you stumble across a man’s profile that looks as if it took ten minutes to fill out, odds are he is not that serious about finding a meaningful connection. Those who are interested in finding something meaningful will take the time to carefully express everything they are looking for, in order to provided themselves with the best possible chance of online dating success. And besides, even if he is serious about finding a relationship, but has a short profile, this is still an indicator that he may be lazy and have little drive in other aspects of his life.

2. The types of pictures he has posted.
The written portion of the profile is not the only part of the profile that tells the story of what the man is all about. As the old saying often goes, a picture can easily be worth a thousand words, and then some. If you are looking at a man who is partying it up in every single picture, acting over the top silly in every single picture, or a guy who is with random different women in every single pictures, then there is a good chance that you are dealing with a man who is still on the immature side, and is not even close to being ready for a serious relationship. Avoid this at all costs.

3. The amount of times he logs on.
If you notice that a man is consistently logging on to the dating site you are on, even after your first date, odds are that he is not looking to settle down with you anytime soon. This is especially true when It occurs weeks later. In order to know whether or not he is logging on all the time, be sure to block your profile from views before actually spying on him. Many sites will allow you to make it private when you view somebody else’s profile. The last thing that we want to do is have the man thinking we are stalkers when we are merely just curious about whether or not he has the right intentions with us.

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20 October 2014

You Didn't Break - The Relationship Broke Up


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How soon can I heal after a break up?
This is a major setback and it really does depend on several factors.

After a breakup, you really have two choices. One, leave the healing to time. Two, take charge of the recovery process. 

The first method will take a long time, pain and suffering before healing. It is slow and torturous. The second method, taking control, will allow anyone to accelerate the healing process, learn fast and move on, leaving space to find healthier and more fulfilling love than ever before. 

You may need some guidance on the steps for a fast and productive emotional healing. We have never been taught how to heal emotionally, so when we go through an emotional situation we are on our own. We need a method, a successfully proven method for emotional healing.

You can heal but how you heal depends on:

1. You ability to understand the reality of the situation.
The more willing you are to face up to some facts such as a. I made a mistake or made a wrong choice. This excludes blaming yourself.

2. I am responsible to clear this mess (this excludes fault-finding!)


3. The willingness to clear up the mess it would involve something from me. Time, energy, resources and emotional reserves, even relationships etc…
But this is an opportunity cost, meaning: I must be ready to either pay this price or pass on a bigger mess to my children, to my future, and my destiny.


4. Know yourself! When you are AWARE of your own emotional reactions, your thoughts around the experience and the interpretations that you made and the conclusions YOU make then you can through the emotional upheavals still be able to catch yourself, re-channel your thoughts and take action eventually based on reality and never your hurt feelings.

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30 September 2014

Romance is Not Necessarily Love


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 In romantic depictions of love, cute little images of cherubs and cupids abound. But Cupid, in his real incarnation, is not so sweet and cuddly. His arrows can create deep and lasting wounds, and can strike you blind and irrational in a heartbeat. A few disaster-filled run-ins with Cupid’s dart and you can readily believe that love will never work for you.

Even if you take responsibility for your own life in most ways and successfully handle most work and social situations, when it comes to intimate relationships you may feel helpless and out of control. You may find yourself inexplicably obsessing on someone who isn't available or interested, or even feeling so needy and helpless that you are unable to protect yourself when you are criticized, abused or degraded. It’s a very painful experience when a romantic relationship with the partner whom you hope and expect will provide you with love, joy and fulfillment of our dreams turns into a miserable, disappointing and dismal failure.

A Dependent Image of Love
When it comes to love, it’s easy to forget how to think clearly, because we have all been bombarded with images that imply love and dependency are the same thing:
• Lovers should depend on each other to supply their needs, to take care of them and “make it better”,
• Lovers should need each other “You are my happiness, I'd die without you”
• Lovers are incomplete without each other, and that two should “become one”—losing their individual personalities, friends, interests and opinions in the process.
This dependent image of love has been reinforced for generations of songs, poetry, plays, books, movies and television soap operas that have celebrated a dependent model of romantic relationships that contains neediness, desperation and the idea that only love (from a perfect partner) can make life better. This “ideal lover” is supposed to:
• Love you no matter how unreasonable you are,
• Always be there when you want or need him or her,
• Always know exactly how to sooth your hurts,
• Always know (and be prepared to give you) precisely what you want (even if you’re not sure yourself), and
• Put your needs before his or her own needs.
This “romantic” image of love sounds good, but although it seems exciting and fulfilling at first, such a relationship cannot flourish. Since no one else can ever care for you as well as you can yourself (they can't know your needs and wants as well as you do, they can't tell what their care-taking feels like to you, and they also have their hands full with their own needs), one or both of you will wind up feeling ripped off, used, neglected, unloved, and generally dissatisfied.
The romantic ideal creates dysfunctional relationships, in which the ground rules are:
• You can't talk about it (it might upset the other person),
• It's hopeless (since you can’t talk about it, you can't solve it together), and
• We're both helpless (we can’t control our own behavior, or outbursts of anger, or make effective choices).

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27 August 2014

Don't Make The Same Mistake Twice!

You are fresh out of a disaster, and you are terrified of the thought of dating again, but you're going to try anyway. Good for you! Here are some guidelines to help you avoid repeating old mistakes:

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1. Pay Attention!
You Have Things to Learn Here! The most important aspect of this date, in addition to having a good time, is to get to know each other better. No matter how excited, turned on or thrilled you may be about this date, listening to what your date says, watching what your date does and understanding how your date feels are still your primary objectives.

2. What Your Date Thinks of You Is Not Your Business.
Your Business Is What You Think of Your Date. One of the easiest ways to lose your objectivity and balance in this is to worry about what your date thinks about you. If you spend your time essentially trying to look at yourself through your date's eyes, guessing what he or she is seeing when looking at you, or hearing when listening to you, you'll miss what's really happening. You're supposed to be evaluating the other person, not pretending to look at yourself through his or her eyes. Pay attention so you know what YOU think of your date.

3. Look for Integrity.
Make sure your date walks his or her talk. Anyone can talk big. Actually, some of the best people don't present themselves well. Don't overlook someone who is not gorgeous, charming and glib, but has all the qualities you really need in a partner.

4. Be very consistent and careful about your sexual safety.
Until the relationship progresses to the point that you become monogamous, and both have been tested for STD's, be careful. The nicest people can be infected with a disease and not even know they have it. If you have had unprotected sex, have your doctor do a screening for STD's. Don't assume your partner is monogamous, especially if you haven't discussed it in detail.

5. Know the signs of emotional blackmail:
A demand: Your date won't take "no" for an answer, and requests are really demands.
Resistance: When every discussion turns into an argument.
Pressure: Your date pressures you to go along.
Threats: Your date uses threatening or coercing tactics: threatening to end the relationship, tears, rage, badgering. Hopefully, because you've thought about the serious issues in advance, you'll still be able to relax and have a good time.  If it's so good, that you decide to keep dating each other. Then, you'll need a whole new set of skills.

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12 August 2014

Get The Loving Relationship That You Want And Deserve

Successful living begins with loving, passionate relationships that are mutually beneficial to both partners. Many people "settle" for just any relationship and never get the love they want and deserve.
If you want a loving, passionate relationship with that special someone, then you have to be willing give more of yourself unconditionally to get the rewarding marriage you want and deserve. Zig Ziglar said it best when he said, You can have everything you want if you help others get what they want.
Many people measure their success in life by the loving relationships that they have with their spouse or significant other. When a person finds that special someone in their life, they find new meaning and purpose.

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Almost all successful, loving marriages begin with a strong chemical and hormonal bond, but that is only the beginning. That chemical component is a very good start, but it is not the only ingredient for developing a deep, meaningful relationship. Lasting relationships are based on love, trust, friendship, values, goals and so much more.
Having a successful life is impossible unless you have happy, healthy relationships. Strong, life-long marriages begin with the understanding that there must be give and take with the other person. You must give to them and they must, in turn, give back to you. Likewise, you must be willing to receive from each other.
One person can not do all of the giving and one do all of the receiving. I promise you if this is happening in a marriage, then this relationship is headed for failure and, possibly, worse because this is the makings of an abusive relationship, not a healthy one. And if you are in an abusive relationship, then you need to get out of it now. Take action to get control of all aspects of your life.
Effective marriages require each person to openly express their feelings and positions on all matters pertinent to their relationship. Assuming that our spouse completely understands our needs and will give us what we need without asking for it is not a good practice.
Respect is the key to any relationship. In order to create a more effective relationship, spouses must treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to our husband and by trying sincerely to understand how they function. You can also show respect to your husband by confirming that they are doing everything they can. Affirming our mate is something that is greatly overlooked and ignored by many couples.
The opposite of respect is making quick judgements based on unfounded facts and prejudice. Respect is the very foundation for a great marriage. This also means respecting yourself and respecting your mate and their feelings.

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Listen to your spouse when they are sharing the important things from their day. By effectively listening and not pre-judging their comments, we show them that we care about them and what they do. This is important if married couples are to understand each other.
Just as important as listening itself is developing an atmosphere where each of you can safely express their feelings when they need to. When spouses fail to express whatever is on their mind or their feelings, it can get in the way of building an effective, productive relationship. Be open to one another and you will find you will enjoy a deeper, more meaningful life together.
Focus your time and energy on building a very happy, fulfilling relationship with your mate. Start by giving more of yourself each day and watch the return you get back from them. Get the love that you want, by giving your partner the love that they desire.

17 July 2014

Fear Of Letting Go Of A Bad Relationship


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Do you find yourself stuck in a bad relationship?
By bad I mean one that feels empty, where there are no feelings of intimacy or love, where there is emotional or physical abuse and so on.
One of the main reasons that individuals remain caught in such unsatisfying or abusive relationships is due to the "fear of letting go".


This fear often may have many underlying roots to it. For instance there may be:
1. A fear of being alone.
2. A fear of feeling a deep sense of emptiness.
3. A fear that no one else will ever love you.
4. A fear of taking full responsibility for your life and/or looking after yourself.
5. A need to try to perpetuate some past abusive relationship in the current one.
6. A need to distract one's self from painful feelings that may emerge when the distraction of the current relationship is gone.
7. A fear that one will decompensate or fragment emotionally and/or physically.
Clearly the fact that the relationship is not working is a sign of concern. More concerning however is feeling incapable of exercising a free choice to leave it when all measures to rectify the situation have failed.
The factors mentioned above often are the result of traumatic relational experiences that you have stored in your mind/body and which originate in early childhood.
What is important for you to know is that such experiences limit your ability to have a fulfilling and satisfying life.
Many individuals seek out therapy of one sort or another to lessen the impact of such life history on their relationships but find that even after all is said and done this toxicity is still held deep inside them.

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If you look at how it feels to recall any negative memory, even one that you may have worked on in therapy I think you will recognize that there are always negative feelings and/or negative feelings about yourself associated with it.  These feelings will always limit you in your relational life.

11 July 2014

Stop Being Needy and Start Making Self Respecting Choices

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 Do you know that neediness hijacks the mind and causes one to make choices based on feelings of insecurity, fears of being abandoned or rejected, jealousy, etc.? Do you know this not only makes one feel and appear unattractive it also leaves them feeling out of control and unable to discern whether their choices are actually good ones?
Do you know that means a "needy" person is not in control of themselves or the kind partners they seem to repeatedly find themselves with? Do you know that the only type of person who is willing to accept a needy person is "another" needy person?
Do you know that means needy individuals invariably find themselves in unhealthy relationships that only disappoint and re-traumatise? So is there a way out of this trap? Absolutely!
The way out of this may both astonish and create scepticism so I ask that you be patient and open to what follows because it may be the only thing between where you are now and the possibility of ever realising a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
The way out is to a) realise that neediness is not a normal or natural human trait and b) to totally delete it from within.
Now until you are able to realise the above it will be essentially impossible to accept that it is in fact the truth.

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For instance the need for:
Love, Validation, Acceptance, Appreciation, Intimacy, Care taking, Understanding, Attention, Etc. are responsible for what many refer to as co-dependent relationship patterns.
Individuals who harbour such (and other related) needs are not "whole" rather they find themselves feeling deficient and "in need" of those qualities. The problem is that they have been made to believe that those qualities reside in and can only be supplied to them by others.
As I think you can see this leaves them in a dependent and desperate position where they are constantly having to secure someone else's presence, attention, love, understanding, validation, etc. simply in order to feel momentarily secure and content.
The key word there is "momentary" because as soon as the other must attend to something else the person in question immediately returns to feeling insecure, anxious, etc.
So what does this person tend to do? Well, resort to desperate behaviours that often involve needy, controlling and manipulative strategies to get the other person back.
This is what many refer to as "addictive" behaviours.

So how sustainable and attractive are such strategies?
So if I have convinced you that neediness is both destructive and self destructive and you would like to take the first step to becoming a free, whole and self sufficient person then simply place one hand over your Heart, and as if you are speaking from there simply repeat the following to yourself:
"I recognise that neediness in any form is destructive to me and my relationships and I want in my Heart to begin to wake up from this trance of neediness, become a free, empowered, emotionally independent, self sufficient and whole person."
Now take a moment and reflect on how you are feeling inside.  Although this is only an initial exercise in empowerment often individuals are surprised by feelings emerging from within that they can't explain.  For instance one might begin to feel some of the following: an expansion in the chest area, feelings of peace, quiet, stillness, lightness, joy, relief, fullness, clarity, strength, resilience, etc.
If you feel any of the above and you like this kindly affirm it to yourself again as if you are speaking from the Heart and it will grow stronger.
This is the experience of greater consciousness, wakefulness, presence, discernment and inner truth surging up within you. It is the source of clarity and self trust that supports one in all positive self respecting decisions.
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25 June 2014

Mistakes You Shouldn't Make After a Breakup

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We all lose someone we love at some point. People come in and come out of our lives from time to time. In some cases, you can say that a break up results in the same feelings as the death of someone you love. The process of grieving the loss of a relationship can be quite similar. Many people don't know how to cope with a break up especially if it is their first relationship. While letting yourself grieve is important, there are some tips that you should know about how to go on after a breakup. If you are wondering how to pull the pieces of your life back together then following are some mistakes you should be sure to avoid:

1 - Contacting your ex all the time. This will only cause your ex to run away and sabotage any chances of you becoming friends after the relationship. Also, it may take longer for you to heal if you maintain contact, since you'll also be exposing yourself to the drama of constantly hearing news about your ex (or their new partner).

2 - Spending more than your means. Lots of people think that buying new stuff will help with the depression. This actually doesn't do anything to help with the grieving process. It only distracts you from what you are truly feeling and drains your bank account.

3 - Eating too much. Although it may make you feel better for a while, food is never the answer to depression. And an expanding waistline will only make you feel worse.

4 - Starting to drink, smoke or take up any vices. These vices only provide temporary relief for yourself. However, these habits could only do worse as they lead to health complications or addictions overtime.

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5 - Befriending people who are not supportive. When we lose our self-esteem, we tend to hang around with people who only damage our confidence further. This is the worst way to handle the situation. What you need right now are positive people who can bring back your self confidence.

6 - Seeing someone else. This is the biggest mistake people usually make. You've only broke up last week and you already think you are ready to start something new? You're moving too fast when what you need right now is some time off.

Surviving a break up can be very traumatic. In fact, lots of people don't know how to go on after a break up and find themselves struggling. It may be one of the hardest things you've done in your life. If this is the case, take comfort in the fact that you are not alone. Many have gone through the experience and lived to tell the tale. You might even learn a few things as you allow yourself the time to grieve. Start being happy with yourself again. You know that you can always trust yourself. Don't be too tough on yourself during this time. Give yourself time and you will find healing.

17 June 2014

3 Easy Steps To Help You Be More Outgoing


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How to be more outgoing has a lot to do with your environment. You’ll find that if you’re shy and socially awkward you’ll quite often be in environments that are probably low-key and something you’re familiar with. It can get very uncomfortable when you throw yourself into places like clubs and parties where you don’t know how to fit in. And quite often you’ll find very outgoing people hanging around in these places.
If you learn how to be more outgoing it feels like an open ticket to just about any social environment, it’s incredibly easy to fit in afterwards. The reason you’re not comfortable in the party and club scene is because you probably stay away from it.
It’s a matter of getting familiar in that environment.
So your job is to surround yourself in these places whenever you can. You’ll see it’s easier to orient yourself as you go out more and more and confidence is built because it doesn’t feel foreign anymore.
Yeah I get it, it’s daunting and intimidating just going through this process but remember the key on how to be more outgoing is FAMILIARITY.

Fortunately there are 3 steps that will make this process much easier for you:.

Step 1
The first thing I want you to do is get yourself a wing-man.
In the dating world a wing-man is someone who helps you out while you’re trying to get a woman’s phone number. But in this case the purpose of your wing-man is to go to social events with you. Ideally he’s just as shy or introverted as you are and wants to change that.

Step 2
Go to social events with your wing-man whether it’s parties, clubs or wherever. Make it a habit, so this time if you’re feeling intimidated or left out at parties you’re not alone.

Step 3
Start conversations together. Go up to people you want to speak to and say something. When they respond to what you said make sure it’s your wing-man who responds back. And this rolls into a natural group dynamic with a simple yet effective conversation technique.
You’ll find that how to be more outgoing is less daunting when you use the first 3 Steps. As you do it more often your confidence begins to grow.

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5 June 2014

Flirting For Guys - How To Be Successful!


Let's first have a look at exactly how you ought to approach an interaction with a girl if you really want to be successful.  Flirting isn't about impressing girls. It has to do with revealing your interest in a woman and doing it in a fun, subtle manner. When it's done appropriately, flirting is a way for a guy and a girl to learn whether they're attracted to each other.

Flirting is not impressing her!
To begin with, your goal is not to impress her or to show off. This is the part about flirting that men mess up the most. Flirting is not about showing off! If you hear a guy talking to a girl about his expensive car, his executive job, or his massive bank account, he might believe he's flirting but he's in fact trying to impress her, and probably failing at that.
In truth, flirting isn't really about impressing girls. It has to do with revealing your interest in a woman and doing it in a fun, subtle manner.
 
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Exactly what is flirting then?
When it's done right, flirting is a means for a guy and a girl to find out whether they're attracted to each other.  Here's the thing. If you approach a girl and say, "Hello, you're cute, want to come home with me?" - that isn't flirting. It's being incredibly direct and forward. It bypasses all the build-up of the mating ritual and will generally turn a girl off.
However, if you walk up to a woman, smile at her, get her to laugh, make great eye contact, and possibly wink... all this things conveys interest to her.
While communicating interest is good, you don't want to stop there. You want your flirting to not just let her know that you're interested, but you also want to learn whether she's going to return your interest.
If she does return it, it's an excellent sign, keep going! If not, you need to choose quickly whether you should alter tactics or walk away.

Always remember exactly what your goal is.
Basically, as a man your goal is to convey two things in your flirting:
1) Your masculinity
2) Your self-confidence
Girls find both of these characteristics very attractive. Communicate them indirectly and non-verbally, and you'll have girls feeling warm and tingly when they think of you. Women are empathetic and emotional creatures - they react to feelings and strong emotions. So if you convey your confidence and your male sexuality when you flirt, girls WILL respond!

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30 May 2014

Advice and Tips That Could Help Save Your Relationship


Relationship advice and tips are always a hot topic among any age group, showing that love is not something you always come to understand over time. Different people rub each other in different ways and sometimes things just happen and there's really nothing anybody can do about it. So are there any clear-cut relationship advice and tips that can help just about anybody? Definitely!

Know when you're right, and know when you're wrong. Don't always assume that you're right or that your significant other is wrong, look at things from a logical point of view. Many people look at things with a clear bias towards their side without even realizing it and come off as a sort of bully in some cases.

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Respect your partner's wishes. You may not agree with them sometimes, but never force the person you're in a relationship with to do something they don't want to do. You don't like to be bossed around, do you? Why would the person you love?  Consider your partner's feelings at all times. This pertains mostly to men because they often ignore how the woman feels and accidentally hurt their feelings without even realizing it. Think about what your partner is comfortable with and likes and work with it, not against it. If it's drastically different from what you like or want to do, then you might be better off with someone who is more like you.

Trust your significant other. Trust is a big component in long term and meaningful relationships, and often when there is no trust the relationship doesn't last very long. If one or both of you do not trust each other and drag the relationship on it's going to lead to some pretty big fall downs in the future. Clear up your trust issues as soon as possible and learn to love your partner for who they are.

Don't take a "What's mine is mine" approach to things. Share your belongings with your partner, it will make them feel special and like they're really a part of your life. You may not like letting other people touch your stuff, but if you love each other chances are you'll be living together at some point and then you have to share things with each other. It's not as tough as it sounds.

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These are the most all-encompassing relationship advice and tips you can get and will solve or prevent most problems that come along in any relationship. Many people don't realize what they've done wrong until it's too late and it feels awful to lose a relationship because of a simple problem that you could have worked out very easily. If you love the person you're with, you're going to be willing to make some changes and sacrifices to keep things strong and last as long as possible together.

20 May 2014

Tips For Online Dating - Safety and Success

Every year, many people seek and find relationships through online dating sites. Just like finding romance the conventional way, there are things that you can do to significantly increase your odds of success. However, the major difference between finding your companion online and finding them in the real world is that there are a whole lot more potential matches for you on the internet. Here are some basic tips for online dating success that you can implement in your search. 
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The first thing that you should do is to make your profile picture be the best picture of you. With most online dating sites, this is the first impression that you give potential dates and you only get one first impression. Try to make your photo stand out with a hobby or interest that might grab the attention of people with the same interest. Also, make sure you look your best for the picture.  Don't wear sunglasses that hide your eyes. Once you have someone that is interested, you do not want to lose them with a poorly written profile. There are several immediate turnoffs when it comes to profiles. Most people are looking for someone that has qualities such as being educated, positive, upbeat, and honest. Write your profile in a way that is articulate but does not come off as being condescending. Try to convey wittiness with subtle humor, but do not make statements that are derogatory or could be offensive to anyone. Above all, be positive. Negative statements, even making statements about being lonely or coming out of a bad relationship, are a sure way to turn people away.

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When contacting other people or building your dating profile, it is critical that you be completely honest. You should never lie or act like someone that you are not. Starting any relationship off with lies and deception is fundamental to failure, especially online relationships. If a relationship becomes more serious, your future companion is sure to find out that you lied. Not good.  Much like your creating your profile, you really have to focus on making the first e-mail to a person that you are interested in count. Your e-mail is their first impression of you, so you will want to follow the same steps listed above and some. In addition, you will want to let them know why you were interested in them.  Complementing them based on their picture or profile may earn you extra points, but overdoing it can be fatal. Try to avoid excessive compliments because the reality is that you really do not know that much about them yet.

Be consistent and responsive. If you are serious about online dating, then you should be available daily. Do not leave people waiting for several days for a response. You will give them the impression that you are not interested or they may think that you are too busy for them.  Most importantly, though, you want to stay safe. Most people using online dating sites are genuinely good people seeking a partner, but there are some bad people lurking in the internet shadows. First and foremost, never give out your personal information such as an address, phone number, or full name.  If you decide that you want to meet the person that you have been socializing with, make sure it is in a safe, public location a good distance from your home. Furthermore, do not give that person the opportunity to see your vehicle or license plate because they could use it to follow you home or get your address. Lastly, trust your instincts. If something does not feel right, there is probably something wrong.

2 May 2014

Be sure to "Fight Fair" in a Relationship

So you should be asking yourself, why is it acceptable to fight dirty in sport or at work, but it’s not acceptable to fight like that in a relationship to get what you want? There’s a simple enough response to that. Your boyfriend/girlfriend is supposed to be your best buddy, the love of your life – hurting them or making them look silly just isn’t on! If you do so, you’ll be putting your whole relationship at risk. Just as there is a sensible way to fight diseases, there’s a correct way to fight your corner in relationships.
Don’t walk away from the disagreement! Doing so is a coward’s way out. If you find yourself getting too angry (which could lead you to bring up something you regret), instead of walking away, take a break for a few minutes, then resume the argument when you’ve carefully considered about how to get across your point.  Don’t go making any threats or demands to get your point across. The whole point of fighting fair is that there are no winner and loser. Instead, the two of you need to reach a compromise together. So making ultimatums or demands is not going to help you to reach that, is it?

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Second, remember that under no circumstances can you resort to physical abuse while discussing things with your partner. The same goes for name calling, verbal abuse etc. You must not do it! Don’t deceive or exaggerate to try and pin the responsibility on your partner. Saying “you always do…” or “you never…” is not going to get you anywhere. It’s a blatant falsehood 99% of the time.  Now then, to be able to fight fair, you need to focus on the real reason why you are arguing. Obviously there’s a recent problem that’s caused you and your darling to fight. Stick to that! Don’t just go mentioning something they have done in the past (especially when you have already forgiven it), just because you are losing the argument!

Learn to recognize when you are in the wrong. And don’t be afraid to admit it.
First things first, you need to understand that it’s a good thing for relationships to be competitive. Differences of opinion now and again are a good thing, so long as you both get the time to air your views with the other and sort them out. Supposing one person gets what they want in every argument, that’s no good for other person – there needs to be some give and take, and some heated words are always the best way to achieve that.
Don’t try to read your partner’s mind. Don’t tell them, “you did it because…” or “you always say…” The fact is, this is stupid. You never know what they think! Not really! So maybe you can ask them instead? Try saying, “why did you…?” 

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Keep to these rules (and it would be an idea to show them to your lover as well), and then any arguments you have in your relationship will be resolved far easier.

30 April 2014

Dating Advice You Can Use to Have Success With

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Are you looking for some dating advice that you can use to have fun and have tons of success with women? If so, then this article is for you. You will learn some dating advice that you can use to achieve the kind of dating success with women that you desire. In fact, here's the first dating advice that I can offer you.

1) Get to know her better
One of the best ways to get to know a woman better is by asking her questions. Don't ask close ended questions that end with a yes or no answer. Instead, ask her open-ended questions that require an explanation. You can ask her simple things such as what she likes to do for fun, ask her about her work, or even what she enjoys cooking. Getting to know a woman better is a very effective strategy for getting a woman to open up to you. Here's more dating advice for you to follow.

2) Play games
If you're out on a date with a woman, it's in your best interest to have fun with her. Girls just want to have fun - always remember that. Take her to play a game of mini golf, a local soccer game or you can even take her to play on the go-carts at your local fun park.

3) Take her to a Coffee Shop
You will probably want to start your date off with a coffee date. Coffee dates lend for conversation and you can easily get to know a woman better over a nice cup of coffee. A place like this has a low-key atmosphere and there isn't a serious indication towards it. This is a great place to take a
woman on a first date - so keep this in mind. Here's more dating advice for you.

4) Go window shopping
Hopefully the woman that you're out with is someone that you can see yourself with for a long, long time. And if you're with her for a long while, you will want to get her interests and likes, and surprise her with them from time to time. So going window shopping can be a good idea for you. Take her downtown and start off your date in front of a place that you guys can easily talk about. Try a fashion store or a store that specializes in selling women's shoes. There are all kinds of things that you can talk about in a situation like this.

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Hopefully you will use this dating advice and tips to have the kind of dating success that you desire.
Good luck with using this dating advice now to your advantage.

22 April 2014

How To Attract a Man In A Way They Can't Resist

The science of attraction between the sexes, as complicated as it may seem, is pretty simple to explain in a few lines. Girls are more easily attracted to a guy who appears healthy and stress-free, has a good level of testosterone which makes him appear more manly and chiseled, and has a  protective streak in him which makes him a good mate material and a father. Guys, on the other hand, are more easily attracted to girls based on their appearance or behavior. But that’s not it though.  To truly understand how to attract men and how a man’s mind works, we need to get deeper into the concept of attraction from the male point of view.

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How to attract men in a way they can’t resist
A guy may like a girl for different reasons, but when it comes to physical or sexual attraction at first sight, her physical appearance and her behavior matters more than anything else. So if you want to attract a man and make him desire you, you just need to get his attention the right way. You need to keep this in mind though, love and attraction are two completely different things. A guy may find you extremely attractive, yet he may not end up falling in love with you for his own reasons. But for love to blossom in the first place, you need to build the sexual attraction before you make him fall in love with you. It’s the safest way to make sure the guy falls for you and stays in love with you.

Attraction and how a man views a woman’s body
As we know that physical attraction plays a very big part in attracting a guy, you need to understand what a guy’s mind tells him when he sees you and sizes you up. When a guy sees a girl’s physical assets, he subconsciously sees more than just your breasts or your butt. The right curves in all the right places tells a guy that a girl is fertile and has come of age, and that she’s healthy because her body can afford to waste energy on developing her curves which play the biggest role in sexual attraction. A guy may think a girl is attractive. But in his subconscious mind, he’s gauging you as the woman who may carry his children one day.

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The perfect woman for a real man – She’s cute and sexy
A regular man who isn’t suffering from low testosterone would always find a feminine woman more attractive than a woman who thinks femininity is overrated and displays traits that are traditionally considered manly. While a girl’s physical appearance is the biggest sign of femininity, at times, it  helps if you can display more femininity in your behavior. No, I’m not saying pink frills and scented paper. But there are always other ways to appear cuter and get a guy to take a second and third look at you.  Femininity comes naturally to some girls, but it’s an art that’s worth learning.  If you want to know how to attract men, all you need to do is exude your feminine side while talking to them.

13 April 2014

Tips For Online Dating - Be Yourself!

Are you tired of barhopping and seeing the same old crowd of psycho-girls and/or players that you didn't want to date last week and certainly don't want to date this week? Who hasn't been there and done that? Worse yet, are you trying to find that special someone in a limited crowd and eager to expand to a much, much larger market? If you have thought about using an internet dating site as a way around these problems, but decided that it wasn't for you because of the problems associated with online dating, then you need to follow a few basic tips for online dating.

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Here Are Some Tips For Online Dating:

1. Be Yourself! One of the best tips for online dating is to just be you. After all, you don't want to meet people misrepresenting themselves...do you? If so, please don't answer that question!

2. If Their Picture Looks Too Hot, Then It Probably Is! Another one of the all time great tips for nline dating is to remember that not everything that glitters is gold, and that means people too.

3. Don't Make Up Hobbies Or Exaggerate Interests Just To Fit In And/Or Be Liked. This is one of the best tips for dating period! I know, it might seem like a great way to 'fit in' but the fact of the matter is that sooner or later you are going to be exposed.

If someone told you that they loved cars and then you went into a discussion about which sports cars were the best and they just looked at you like you started speaking a different language then you would probably realize that they had no idea what you were talking about. Following that realization by around a half of a second would be the understanding that this person was not entirely honest. You  don't want to hang out with dishonest people you met over the Internet right? No way! Nobody
else does...or if they do, then they are probably not people that you want to hang around with.

All of these tips for online dating success can be summed up really easily, which makes
remembering them easier: just be yourself!

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25 March 2014

Safe Online Dating Advice for Women

Online dating has become quite popular. Most people date online due to lack of time. Also, people expect to find someone interesting through dating or chatting sites. They can attract someone because of their temperament in spite of their looks. Dating sites have grown to large numbers and continue to become more popular.

There are some online dating tips and etiquette that  everyone should abide by. A woman can't act desperate, even though she may be, on a dating website. Take it as dating advice that a woman should never reveal her personal information because it can be used for stalking purposes. Also, don't be so hasty in replying to emails sent. It conveys that you were just waiting for them.  Also, block all the people who use swear words in their chats.

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Some of them even start talking about sex which is not decent. Also, a woman should not start sending emails to men she locates through networking sites. Men consider such women absurd. Also, showing a revealing photo of yours is not advisable. Try to look pretty and attractively dressed.

A man should not be given too much time. If he does not send a response to your emails after 3 days, he's not interested. Also, only chat with one man at a time. When you are chatting with many men, then slow down your replies so that you remember who you are responding to. This is very important. Getting men confused because you are talking to too many at one time can be very embarrassing.

Women should never talk about their sexual prowess in their profiles. It is very indecent and gives the wrong impression. A woman should have a good sense of humor. This implies that you are interesting to talk to which makes men eager to meet you. Do not talk to anyone before knowing at least some credentials. This ensures that you do not end up meeting a criminal. Online chatting is not always for dating. Sometimes, you can chat with someone for shorter durations to maintain interest.

When the time comes to arrange a face to face meeting, make sure you go to a public place.  A good idea is to start with meeting for coffee, as this gives you the opportunity of making the meeting short, or if things go well, arranging for further dates.

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15 March 2014

Men: How to Make The First Date Go Well!

Congratulations, she said YES to a date! Now what, panic? There are some simple things you can do to help smooth along a first date and maximise the chances of it being a great date so read our first  date advice and see if it helps you.

First you need to decide where your date should be. We've put together some great first date ideas to inspire you but the most important thing is to choose something that suits you and you think she'll like. Make sure your chosen first date idea will give you chance to talk, but maybe provide some distraction too. A coffee or lunch are good as they can be as short or lingering as the situation dictates whereas dinner does tend to promote lingering, which may, or may not, be ideal!

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Next, it's a good idea to prepare yourself for the conversation you'll have with your date. First dates should be about exchange of ideas and information, so don't monopolize the conversation and give her a chance to talk, but also tell her something about yourself to make her feel comfortable and see that you're being open and friendly.  (Don't make the entire conversation about yourself - this give a bad impression of being self centered). Confidence is possibly the single most attractive feature a man can possess ... but it's a fine line between confidence and arrogance.  When it come to getting to know her, it shouldn't be an interrogation and firing question after question at her will make her feel uncomfortable.  If there is an uncomfortable silence then having prepared a couple of topics beforehand will undoubtedly help the situation flow more smoothly; Think of a couple of serious topics you can ask your date questions about ... just make sure you have an opinion on them too!

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* Think of a couple of serious topics you can ask her opinion on. For example, something topical such as the environment or a book or piece of art that's received some press attention recently.

* Think of a couple of amusing anecdotes about your life you can share with her. This is a great thing to do as it makes you appear open and honest which will make her more comfortable whilst demonstrating you can be an amusing conversationalist.

* Make a list of things not to talk about - ex girlfriends for example are a definite no-no, as is your
obsession with late night drinking with your mates seven days a week.

Get yourself into the right frame of mind before your date. No-one wants to date a grumpy man so
make sure that you go to the date feeling positive and upbeat. Confidence is possibly the single most attractive feature a man can possess so make sure you're feeling confident about yourself - tell yourself you are an attractive and interesting person, that the date is going to be a good experience and you are looking forward to it and it will be a success and you should go into it feeling great which will show!

Get your grooming and hygiene sorted. There is no excuse for not being clean and presentable on a date. Making no effort will be perceived as disrespectful as she will assume you simply couldn't be bothered. You don't need to arrive looking like a catwalk model in all the latest fashion but you should be showered, shaved if appropriate, have cleaned your teeth and be wearing washed and ironed clothes. If you normally wear aftershave then do so but don't bathe in it, subtlety is the better part of attraction!

Watch your manners. There are very few ladies who don't appreciate having a door held open for them, being shown to a table and allowed to sit first and being told she looks lovely. Just do it with sincerity and be natural, tripping her up in a race to reach the door first tends to mean the gesture loses impact!

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 o Dating tip: avoid politically intense or sensitive areas and heavy religious discussion on a first date unless you have specifically chosen a date on their political or religious viewpoint.
o Dating tip: it's obvious but... make sure you have an opinion on the topic too, otherwise you'll look a bit stupid!
o Dating tip: don't choose a topic you have no interest in whatsoever as it'll show!

7 March 2014

Survey says: South African Singles are lonesome



Millions of people recently celebrated Valentine's Day around the world, and it seems South Africans are facing a stark reality: they are love-starved.
According to a survey released, more than 32% single adults admit to feeling depressed and anxious about not finding love.
In the poll, conducted by a well known generic pharmaceutical specialising in medication for the treatment of depression and anxiety - three in 10 of the 529 single adults polled nationally, said being single makes them feel lonely, 12% said they felt less attractive and 36% blamed themselves for their loveless situation.
However, the majority (89%) still firmly believes in true love and 76% said that finding that special someone would contribute greatly to their overall state of happiness.
A spokesperson for the company said the today's young people are finding it harder to find long-term relationships.
According to the poll, the gym, book and dance clubs are popular hangouts for single South Africans.

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More than 35% of respondents said they are confident about finding their match online, while 26% cited the workplace, 23% the supermarket, 22% the park and 16% still relied on the local pub to produce their perfect mate.  Altogether 55% said they withdraw from dating opportunities and reject suitors based on past experiences.

The overall experience of online dating, and the ability to filter and specify the type of person you want to meet and date is gaining huge popularity around the world.  The ability to meet somebody online who you may never have met without the online dating site is a positive aspect to the process of signing up, profiling yourself and enjoying the experience of finding that "special someone".

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25 February 2014

Online Dating - The Best Tips For Meeting The One For You


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Online dating has gained tons of popularity over the last few years. People are meeting other people online every day. Now, there are dozens of websites designed specifically for helping you find the right one. If you're interested in finding someone over the internet, you're going to need some tips for online dating to help you get started in the right direction.

Sign Up With Legitimate Sites - Don't sign up with websites that are not known well. For best results, it's recommended to find a couple of sites where there are lots of people. You definitely don't want to miss out on finding the right one.

Take The Tests - One thing you'll notice upon signing up to dating websites is that most offer a series of personality quizzes and tests to help match you with people you are compatible with. These tests are taken in the comfort of your own home while sitting at your computer. The end result is that you get paired with people who have similar interests to yours, which will provide you with a better online dating experience. You don't have to take the tests, but it's highly recommended if you want to enjoy good matches.

Put Up Pics - After you create your account, you'll be asked to upload a photo. You might not want to do this, but for best results, you should. Other people's first impression of you will be based on your photo. You'll also get a lot more messages and profile views, which is exciting to say the least. However, if you don't put up at least one pic of yourself, you might just find that no one is interested. After all, wouldn't you want to know who you were talking to?

Be Courteous, Respond! - When someone writes you a message, the worst thing you can do is not respond to them. Take a few moments to review their profile to see if you are truly interested. If you're not interested, the best way to let someone know that you're not into them is by not responding to them. However, if anything about them strikes your fancy, then let them know!

Check Your Mail Regularly - One of the best tips for online dating is to check your mail regularly. Checking your mail is the only way to know who has written you a message. It also helps to make sure that you do not sign up to so many sites that you become overwhelmed. Sign up to only a few, and remember to check your messages and respond accordingly.

Get To Know Them - After identifying a couple of people you are interested in, take the time to get to know them. Don't swap numbers just yet, but do take the time to chat online. It's important that you don't spend too much time chatting online, however, as most people quickly move on after a few conversations. If you plan to take this seriously, you should chat with them for a few weeks at most, swap numbers, and then meet in person.


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These tips for online dating are designed to make sure that you have the best possible online date
experience. Remember that in order to be successful you must take online dating seriously. If
you're truly interested in meeting someone, you won't have any problems doing so online.

18 February 2014

Dating Tips We Should Know About

Don't you wish there was a magic way that could solve all of our dating troubles? I'm sure you do!  Fortunately that is not the case. I say fortunately because accepting it just the way it is makes life so much more interesting. Could you imagine a relationship with no challenges? Pretty mundane, don't you think? Relationships are not something we're instructed on, but instead, it's a way of life and the only way to learn is through trial and error, and learning from our mistakes.  We can learn a lot through, not only our experiences, but the experiences of our peers as well. No matter the age, we can all take in a little something from each other.

1. Commitment: means to show loyalty, duty or pledge to something or someone. Before jumping into the dating world, ask yourself, "Am I ready to be loyal? Am I ready to change my lifestyle so that it accommodates more than one person? Am I ready to keep all the promises I made?" Think carefully about it.

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2. Know Yourself. Before you can ever set out to know someone new, make sure you know who you are yourself. It's important for us to learn who we are before we can introduce ourselves to someone we barely even know.

3. Know What You Want. When you know who you are you're able to know exactly what it is you want. Once you know what you want, let it come it you. No need to go looking for it.  Believe it will happen for you - if you have a positive and self confident attitude people will be drawn to you.

4. Appearance. The way you carry yourself is also very important. The attraction you put out is the attraction you bring in. Meaning, you attract the type of people you portray yourself to be. If you dress nicely and take good care of yourself, then you'll attract the type of people who do the same.  Trust me, they will come.

5. Have Fun! No need to be nervous about the whole dating world. Let go and have fun. Dating shouldn't be a duty, but rather, a time of fun. Enjoy the date despite of what it may be tomorrow. Make it a wonderful experience!

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If we all lightened up a little, we'd realize just how much simpler things could be. Not easy, but easier. Nothings easy, but with the right tools, you can reach your goal.

5 February 2014

Do You have a Pattern of Bad Relationships?


Meet YOUR Black Diamond

Bad Relationship Patterns - where we constantly begin relationships that start out full of promise, only for them to end up in disappointment and sadness. If this sounds like you, if you suffer bad relationship patterns, then you will do well to learn to recognize what the problems are. This is the only to escape from that constant cycle of pain and sadness.

When choosing our partners, the whole process appears to go through stages. Firstly, we become aware of someone’s attractiveness, and their exciting personality (or vice versa). What comes next is the discovery that we possess certain interests, principles etc., that are common to us. Then we come to a state of mental arousal, where we begin to “click”, before finally, a more meaningful, psychological attachment develops.

If you experience bad relationship patterns, then surely you’ll recognize these feelings:
Conflict, Obsession, Feeling of Loss/Loneliness, Physical sensations/reactions, Repetitiveness/Boredom, Vulnerability.

  • Conflict: Never mind how you felt about your lover, deep down you always recognized something wasn’t quite ideal about the relationship. You felt feelings of jealously, uncertainness, nervousness or stress because of the relationship you were in.
  • Obsession: You believe that it is your own actions or words that drove your partner(s) away, though you remain convinced that you can fix things and turn the object of your passion into the adoring, loving person you desperately desire.
  • Feeling of loss: At the end of the relationship, you feel a sense of deep loneliness. Where you once felt a ‘connection’ with your lover, now there is only sadness, regardless of how painful or stressful that relationship turned out.
  • Physical sensations: Something your lover says or does, results in a familiar physical sensation that is deeply uncomfortable, for instance, a headache or a knot in your stomach.
  • Repetitiveness: Lots of your relationships started full of promise and hope, only to spectacularly fail later . Even though the people involved are not the same, the ending always turns out badly.
  • Vulnerability: You have a long-standing vulnerability; you are very conscious of your own ego and as a result are always looking to ‘prove yourself’ to your lover.
 If you experience one or more of the symptoms detailed above, and you find it difficult to forge long-lasting relationships, then you could have an issue with bad relationship patterns. So what can you do about this? Simple – you need to discover your own psychological needs are. By discovering yourself, you will identify the forces at work that shove you into the clutches of undesirable partners. Once this is understood, you will actually be able to avoid bad relationship patterns and into a more rewarding, loving relationship that you seek.

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