21 July 2016

Shy? What to Do When You Run Out of Things to Say


Sometimes in conversation, you’ll run out of things to say. This is especially true if you’re kind of shy or you’re not a very good conversationalist. At certain points, you just won’t know what to say next. But you can overcome this situation quickly enough.
There are a few effective techniques that you can employ in a conversation when you run out of things to say, in order to handle the situation effectively. Here they are. 

1. Think about your day.
There has to be something that happened to you during the day that you can talk about. If it’s early in the morning, then during the day before, or the one before that. And you can talk about it, even if it’s trivial.
So when you run out of things to say, think about your day a bit and see if you find something to share: a short story, something you heard on the news, something you enjoyed doing, almost anything goes. 

2. Know and use your strong topics.
As an exercise, take at some point a few minutes to think about some stuff that constitutes good conversation topics in general and you can talk about. It could be books, movies, travelling, career, music, sports, politics; there is a wide range of potentially good topics.
Pick the ones that fit you best and create your own short list of conversation topics. Then when you’re chatting with someone and don’t know what to say next, think about this shortlist, pick a topic from it and continue the conversation on that topic.

3. Let the other person speak.
You don’t have to necessarily continue a conversation when it comes to a stop. Very often, if you just wait a bit and say nothing, you’ll notice that the other person will say something and thus move the conversation forward.
So sometimes when you run out of things to say, it’s a good idea to not try to say something else yourself. Instead, let the other person have the floor and continue the conversation. And usually they’ll do it. 
4. Dare to speak.
Many times if seems that you ran out of things to say, but you haven’t. You have things to say, but you won’t allow yourself to say them because you think they’re not good enough. So you keep searching for something better to say.
In my experience as a coach helping others improve their social skills, this perception is typically wrong. What you have to say is worth saying. So the best thing you can do is to speak your mind. Be bold and say what you have to say.
Apply the advice I gave you and your conversations will visibly improve. There is a long way that your discussions can go and plenty of opportunities to learn how to take them there.

1 July 2016

Overcoming Your Break Up when Your Boyfriend is Dating Once More


It is never easy to overcome a break up. Interestingly, one of the things that can help you out is to begin dating once more. Of course, it is not easy to muster the courage to start going out for a date after your break up. The intimacy you shared with your ex, and the duration of your relationship, will make the break up even more difficult to endure. In such a case, you will find it very odd to go out on a date with someone new. Yet dating is one of the things that can lift you out of the gloom of a break up.

It may be even more challenging in case your ex boyfriend is already dating once more. However, you should understand that it is by dating that you will get his attention even at such a stage. Your ex boyfriend may be going out on a date while there are at least some residues of love towards you. When he realizes that you are seeing another guy, the stinging arrows of jealousy will hit him. Then he may begin to reconsider his decision.

Dating after a break-up, and when your ex is already up and about, will undoubtedly be difficult. However, there are some things that will help you out.

Speed dating
Although speed dating is still a relatively new phenomenon, it is becoming popular fairly fast. Basically, speed dating involves meeting several single people who are looking for relationships, and spending brief moments with each potential date. This offers a number of advantages.

You will largely be able to maintain your privacy, as speed dating is relatively anonymous. Safety is also enhanced given the controlled environment in which you will meet. In addition, you will be able to meet several people who have similar interests.

Online dating
This is another very popular mode of dating nowadays. It gives you the opportunity to meet numerous people with whom you share similar interests. Some online dating sites even offer some kinds of match-making services, where you will fill a questionnaire and then receive an update of potential dates who match your requirements.   Online dating has been trusted over time, and some very great relationships started in this way.

Match-maker services

During the earlier times, matchmakers were highly respected. Although the practice became outdated for some time, its value has been appreciated in the recent past and it is coming back in vogue once more. There are match-making services that will get you in touch with potential dates that you would have not met otherwise.

This is an option that you should consider only when you are serious about finding someone new to start a serious relationship with. Keep off it in case you still expect to get back with your ex.